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Please review my photostory

It’s the first one I ever done. I shoot news mostly and never done any documentary project. I would appreciate any feedback on that project .  the story is here http://www.antipix.com/en/photostory/story.shtml?id=60&uid=0 .

Thanks
Dmitry

by [a former member] at 2005-10-11 01:04:22 UTC (ed. Mar 12 2008 ) Moscow , Russia | Bookmark | | Report spam→

Dmitry,
I think it’s a fine story. You have many different scenes that all pertain to a coal minner’s life, not just pics from the mine. The wide shots are nice, give a sense of the town and life above ground. You have nice portraits, and the color works well. Most people would have shot a coal mine in black and white I think, so I like that you did it well in color. The men working in the mine are fine, but of course we’ve all seen pictures of men in the mine before. What grabbed me was the pictures above ground. I thinkYou could loose a few pics, not sure what the kids playing terrorist has to do with the story, and maybe instead of the kid doing a handstand, you could show him learning mechanics to avoid the mines. Shots like the train going by stacked with coal are great to move the story along. And the women waiting at the hospital adds another dimension. You have good attention to the overal shots of the mine. I especially like the shot through the factory window and the shot of the gate with dog. Men drinking by green wall, sweet. Some people don’t like being compared to other photographers, but I don’t have a problem with it unless the other photographer sucks. I see a bit of Alex Webb in your pictures. And Alex is fucking great.
Nice work Dmitry

by [former member] | 11 Oct 2005 09:10 | Oakland, United States | | Report spam→
Like Eros said I really like the color, and the portraits are relly nice all the shots are super crisp I really like theses photos. You talk about the injuries that a lot of the men receive but theres no shots of this I think that could add some impact too the story, also you mention their lack of pay but don’t really show living conditions that the coal miners live in, if they still have nice homes and live comfortably you could show how they are able to stretch their dollars, though you do show other people in the town and a retired coal miner.I only mention this because you have a shot of an orphanage and the elderly women at the hospital, its not only shots of the coal miners themselves. So i’m kind of confused if the story is about the coal miners and conditions they work in or the town because when you read the article it seems to be about the coal miners and half the photos are the coalminers and where the work but then the other half is about the town. I could be wrong, so no one jump me too hard.  But I really like the photos I was just commenting on the "Photostory" part.  John

by John Roark | 11 Oct 2005 10:10 | Portland, ME, United States | | Report spam→
John has a good point. Back up all your story points with imagry: lack of pay, dangerous conditions, and I’d like to see more of what the miners do in their homes. I think that to have success, the story has to be about what happens above ground, because we know more or less what happens in the mine. I really like a few of the mine pictures, and you have to have them no doubt, but show us more of what happens when these guys go home.
Keep it up Dmitry, add new pics and take old ones out. Editing is the key.
EKH

by [former member] | 11 Oct 2005 11:10 | Oakland, United States | | Report spam→
Thank you for your comments and your critics. Its very important for me and I really appreciate it. I’ll try to work on my story to improve it now when I see its weaknesses. Thanks again.

by [former member] | 13 Oct 2005 01:10 | Moscow, Russia | | Report spam→
Just thought I’d add to the comment of Eros about pics of what happens to these guys outside of mines, i.e. in their homes . to have a coherent story sometimes its help to focus on one key point of the story, lets say the core from which you are able to map out a sequence of photos that stand out on their own yet support each other as well in an final edit. 
Have you thought about following just one of the miners? It might give you the chance to carry the story on into the home, social life etc…Following one miner could give you more focus and could create a visual platform from which more initmate and dynamic photos may come about. Give it a think, maybe one of the miner is more photogenic has a interesting life outside of the mine e.g. hobbies 
Maybe you want to give the story a more general sense of life as a miner, if so then all the above will not apply! Echoing Eros’s advice Keep it up, if anything keep taking photos and edit all the time asking for opinions as well, sometimes we are so bogged down with so many pictures to edit that its takes somebody else’s trained eye to spot a photo that could work for your story!


by foyle | 13 Oct 2005 03:10 | Valencia, Spain | | Report spam→
Dmitry, fine work you have done.  The story you have chosen to tell is a very worthy one. Since I am still getting more experience, I haven’t many critiques, just praise for a job well done. Thank you for sharing this with us.

I noticed your statement had some grammar and spelling mistakes so I’ve corrected that for you below.

Best Regards.

-———————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

Donbass (a coal-field on the south of Russia) was once a symbol of the industrial might of the USSR. During that era, the coal mining industry was as important to the country’s livelihood as petroleum is in modern day .

Work conditions in the mines haven’t changed much since then.  Every year, 3-4 miners die of an accident in every mine. Many more receive severe injuries.

A coalminers’ salary is typically 2.6 dollars a day and in rare cases a miner receives up to $600 a month.  Those working on the surface receive even less.

After 20 years of work, all miners have come down with work-related diseases and receive a small pension. As depleted mines have begun to close one-by-one, people have begun moving out of the area, leaving their land and their homes to slow
deterioration.




by Wayne Huang | 13 Oct 2005 12:10 | New York City, United States | | Report spam→
Thanks. Especially for the statement correction. I have problems with english.

by [former member] | 14 Oct 2005 23:10 | Moscow, Russia | | Report spam→

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Participants

John Roark, Photographer John Roark
Photographer
Twisp, Wa , United States
foyle, foyle
Valencia , Spain
Wayne Huang, Wayne Huang
Los Angeles , United States ( LAX )


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